Friday, December 16, 2005

why everyone gotta have typepad

I'm a little bored. Nothing to read!

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Why I think the social worker doesn't like us

There are things she has said that seem like she is just trying to tick us off. She's not encouraging. She talks about the adoption process a lot and about parenting very little. Here are some things she's said that I interpret as negative:

1. "You don't have a car? What if you have to take the baby to the hospital?"
Why of course, we will now purchase an automobile for the rare and unlikely event that we need to take the child to the hospital, and the situation is not urgent enough for an ambulance, yet too urgent for a taxi, a neighbor, a zipcar. Despite having no place to park said car and very poor driving skills. That would make our lives safer, not more dangerous.
2. "Your families are supportive but they live so far away. It's just the two of you here all alone."
Yes. We are friendless, we have no telephones, and despite living in a major urban center, no one would ever come to our aid. It's surprising we have not yet been devoured by bears or starved to death, without our mothers living upstairs.
3. "I have been working in adoption for twelve years and I have never met anyone with such low expectations." This one is just like, what the fuck? What the hell do you want from us? You want us to meet you at the door demanding our baby?
4. (Smugly, when she asked a question about the placing agency we didn't know the answer to) "I guess I ask more questions than you do." okay, now you're just a bitch

I'm just tired. Just exhausted from trying to figure out how to please her. WE ARE AWESOME. Why doesn't she believe us?

Wednesday, December 14, 2005


Is something I do well!
Here's today's batch of whine:
-Our social worker thinks we're stupid idiots, I swear
-And she doesn't like us very much, I think
-And the office holiday party is really just a meeting with booze
-I hate meetings
-and I don't drink
-So what's the point?
-It is also mandatory
-And the social worker unfavorably compared us to another couple

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Breakin all the rules

I know the rules about not talking about work in a blog.
But how else will I think things out?

I haven't told anyone at work that we're adopting. I'm not really friends with anyone so it's never going to just come up. (There's a bit of a running joke between my boss and co-workers, when the projects are getting really rough and things are going badly, they joke that they're going to have or adopt a baby "tomorrow" so they won't be in to work! So would they even believe me if I told them??) But eventually I kind of have to say something. And I've been wondering. Can they, like, fire my ass for planning to take time off?
My company doesn't have any parental leave policy. They have a short-term disability leave that you can take if you are a woman and you "have" a baby. That's more for the medical status than the parental status. So I'm planning to just use FMLA to get my 3 months off. If I declare that I am planning to, at some point in the next year or so, call in one morning and then not show for 12 weeks--can they say, um no, we're replacing you? I know they couldn't fire me if I were pregnant and said I was going to take 12 weeks off after having a baby. But that's because there's a law against firing women for being pregnant. Is there any law against firing someone for planning to take leave in the future? I know you can't be fired for USING FMLA. but could you be let go before you did? I wonder.

Monday, December 12, 2005


is the sound I make after eating
barbecue chicken
fruit salad
mashed potatoes
piece of chocolate cake the size of my head

Tis the season for other departments to have luncheons, and for me to loiter around conference rooms in order to score the leftovers. god bless caterers with poor estimation skills.

Home visit on Tuesday Afternoon. or Tomorrow. CRAP!

Thursday, December 01, 2005

The Nemesis

Everyone has their nemesis. Their Lex Luthor. Their Joker. Their baby with the one eyebrow. If you can't think of your rival, then it's probably because I have claimed him as my own and he's busy battling me for world domination, and can't be bothered to foil your plans at every turn. I have my hands full with these types, though.
In college, there was Marian. Marian was the ultimate over-acheiver. As I recall, one of the first times I encountered her, she was detailing her plans to get a double major while graduating a year early. As if that wasn't nauseating enough, one of these majors was MY MAJOR. My weird, no one has ever heard of it major. You know, the only thing making me unique in a sea of sameness. She started showing up in my (small) classes, and I totally resented her. Resentment is a word which was probably invented at the time, to describe my feelings for her, which had been heretofore unknown by humankind. I was that awful. Marian was better than me, I'm not ashamed to admit. She always understood the reading, while it flew over my head. She asked insightful questions. She actually worked on research projects, while I scraped through school barely understanding the point of education, period. She was ambitious, and smart, and I pretty much wasn't, but they were traits I wished to have.
When I was very young, I had a friend who had been a similar figure to me. She was always one step ahead of me in every endeavor. She and I had a lot in common, but she was just one notch up. The problem was that we were friends and I admired her more than hated her, so I probably came off as a sidekick rather than a matched adversary. Alas. At the time, I had a picture book called "Timothy Goes to School." It was about a racoon or badger or other little creature who is constantly being one-upped by another little woodland animal, Claude. Eventually Timothy makes friends with a little girl rabbit who has her own competition. The little rabbit, Violet, describes her foe, saying, "She sings, she dances, she counts up to a thousand, and she sits next to me!"
I have always treasured that story and that description. Because while I will always know that there are people better than me at whatever I attempt, I don't really mind as long as they are TV champions, internet stars, historical figures. It's the proximity that really makes me look bad.
So anyway, here at work we are in the holiday season, when ordinary offices become minefields of forced activities like canned-food drives, luncheons, office-wide parties, white elephant games, and of course, the cookie swap.
Oh, the cookie swap. There is a particular cookie that I have been baking since I was about 14 years old. It is buttery and flavorful and just about the best cookie I make. I've perfected it over the years, and I like to think it's my signature cookie. It's called Double Gingersnap. I was planning on making that for the godforsaken cookie swap.
And of course, today I overhear that my Nemesis, Captain Loud, is making--you guessed it--ginger cookies. It's a Christmas Miracle! I mean Nightmare!