One Time...

Everyone is doing That Thing with the posting every day.
I am mildly embarassed that there is absolutely no way I could keep up, even after reading Mighty Girl's book.
But I have tiny postage stamps of stories...the kind that start "one time..." and end with everyone at the party avoiding me for the evening.
The first, i will call:

The One Time I Got Run Over By A Bike

one time, I got run over by a guy on a bike
I was walking along, minding my own, when wham! I guy comes straight at me and knocks me flat.
The front wheel struck me where my nuts would be if I were a dude
good thing I'm not. I had ugly bruises on my CROTCH.
CROTCH BRUISES, PEOPLE
Oh, and he totally didn't stop, he KEPT GOING. Hit and run CROTCH BRUISER!!
I cried, but I do that a lot.